Monday, 18 May 2015

That whole blog writing thing went SWIMMINGLY


Hi again.

Uhm, long time no see?

Once upon a time in a galaxy far far away I decided to write a blog, and do a post EVERY SINGLE DAY. Remember than? Remember that guys... yeah it went fabulously...


So I'm now 19. Still writing (barely) and have decided to try to write blogs again. I'd love to promise once a week, but with my track record if I manage once a year Ima self-five myself into oblivion.

Also 16 year old Summer sucked, and I have cringed hella lot reading my preivous posts so lets just ignore them yes? Good.

Live Long and Prosper homies X

Friday, 3 February 2012

The Evoloution of Socks

Socks are a great invention. Who ever it was who though of them must've been a genius. Can you imagine? Dave-The-Caveman... strolling in, massive grin on his face holding up what looks like a furry stomach, turns to his 'cave-mate' William...

Dave-The-Caveman: "Will mate. Guess what I've invented?"

Will: Oh lawd. If it's another one of you're attempts at making 'fire' - which I don't even believe exists - someone WILL die.

Dave-The-Caveman: Nuh uh! These are so much better! You know how when it gets really cold your toes fall off? These stop that from happening so you don't end up like Freddie-no-toes over there. Poor sod.

*Fred hobbles past*

Both: Alright fred?... Yeah?... good mate... good. 
Will: Well DaveCave, these are actually proper decent. What you gonna call them anyhow?

Dave-The-Caveman: I was thinking of calling them the 'Toe-keepers'. It's sophisitcated, smart... what could be better?

*Will starts giggling*

Will: Do you know what we should call them? ... oh.... we couldn't... but... *giggles*

Dave-The-Caveman: Ohhh! that's not faair! you have to tell me now!

Will: Ooo it would be so naughty!... um... well what about *whispers to Dave* ... Cocks? ... Ahahaha!

*both laugh hysterically*

Will: Swear and promise you'll name them that man, or you owe me a club!

*Stacy walks in*

Stacy: What in the name of Thor have you two lunatics got on your feet? DAVID CAVEMAN. Explain yourself!

Dave-The-Caveman: uh they are called erm c*cks...

Stacy: WHAT?! urgh you two make me sick! stupid men... never change... all the work round here! *mutters*

Will: Stace, sis. Calm. what he meant to say was they are called uh... they're called... S..Socks. yeah socks. they stop your toes from falling off and stuff y'know? 

*Stacy looks interested and tries them over*

Dave-The-Caveman: *mouths at Will* COCKS!

And there you have it. A completely honest and 100% accurate re-enactment of the First ever Pair of Socks, along with proof that men literally were always obsessed with their willies. 

Thursday, 2 February 2012

The Original Post. *Cue dramatic music*

Hello world of 'Blogdom'! - I made that up actually. I'm probably an undiscovered genius, although so far no one has ever appreciated my brilliance. In fact I tend to irritate people in general... Ahh well, there's always tomorrow! To be honest, since I have no followers, technically I'm talking to myself - which is apparently the first sign of madness. Luckily for me, I'm so far past the 'First sign of madness' that I don't care, and shall proceed to wallow in my insanity. *wallowing*

Right, in case you are unaware, a little bit slow, or convinced you are reading the undiscovered blog of Cinderella ( I am not blonde, a princess or able to sing to animals in such a way that makes them tidy up, when I sang to my hamster, all that happened was he chewed my rug.) I am a 16 year old British student named Summer. And before you think to yourself 'Ha! what a stupid pen-name!' - My name actually is Summer. Thankyou parents. You have surpassed yourself in your parenting skills yet again. Not that its hard enough to survive school as it is without a dumb name or anything. *I'm raising my hand in a sarcastic salute but you cant actually see me so I'm looking a little bit strange...*

After spending 16 years alive...ish... I, have achieved many great things such as managing to roll my tongue, whistle blowing in AND out! ('m so proud!!!) and have managed to learn to spell my middle name. As a child it was my dearest abmbition to grow up to be a kitten, unfortunately reality has set it, and so i've decided upon the must more realistic dream of becoming a penguin. Kittens are cute and everything but penguins are just badass. Seriously. Nothing beats a penguin. Nothing I tell you! *glares*

As this is my blog I am warning you now, its going to be wierd. This is where I am going to be writing my inmost thoughts, most of which would earn me a life sentence in a padded cell. With a teddy bear, named Colin Wilberforth Jones. But I'm digressing... My blog is not always going to be cheerfully mad either. If I'm angry, I am going to come online and throw a verbal hissy fit, and if i'm excited you are going to be blinded by a cacophony of exclamation marks. It sucks for you. In fact you should probably just back away slowly, and quietly click on another more reasonable, normal blog where they discuss national debt and the failing economy and the reasons why buying shoes and going to theme parks turns us all into raging psychopaths along with a detailed analysis of tea. You have been warned.

Dun dunn DUNNNN...

Oh, and hi by the way. Nice to meet you. We should meet up and terrorise boring people and whatnot.